Frequently Asked Questions
Q: What does the term 'stubborn and rebellious son' mean in Deuteronomy 21:18?
A: According to Rashi and the Talmud (Sanhedrin 71a), a 'stubborn and rebellious son' (ben sorer u'moreh) refers to a specific legal case where a young boy, between the ages of 13 and 13.5, steals from his parents to satisfy excessive gluttony and drunkenness, despite repeated warnings. The Torah sets strict criteria for this rare situation, emphasizing the severity of rejecting parental authority and moral discipline.
Q: Why is the case of the rebellious son mentioned in the Torah?
A: The Rambam (Hilchos Mamrim 7:1-2) explains that this law teaches the importance of proper child-rearing and the dangers of unchecked rebellion. Though the actual punishment was nearly impossible to implement (the Talmud states it never occurred), its presence in the Torah serves as a moral lesson about the consequences of extreme disobedience and the need for early correction in education.
Q: What can parents learn from the verse about the rebellious son?
A: The Midrash (Sifrei Devarim 218) derives that parents must strive to educate their children with patience, clear boundaries, and consistent discipline. The verse highlights the responsibility to guide children before negative behaviors become ingrained. Jewish tradition stresses chinuch (proper education) to prevent such extreme cases from arising.
Q: How does the concept of a 'rebellious son' apply today?
A: While the legal case is theoretical, Orthodox Judaism applies its principles by emphasizing early moral education (Pirkei Avos 1:2). Parents and teachers are encouraged to address disobedience promptly with wisdom and compassion, ensuring children internalize Torah values. The verse reminds us that small behavioral issues, if ignored, can escalate into serious character flaws.
Q: Why does the verse mention both the father and mother's voice?
A: Rashi notes that the inclusion of both parents teaches that the son must be disobedient to both to qualify as a 'ben sorer u'moreh.' This underscores the Torah's expectation of unified parenting (Talmud Sanhedrin 8:4) and the equal importance of honoring both father and mother (Exodus 20:12). Disrespect to either undermines the family structure.
The Case of the Ben Sorer U'Moreh (Stubborn and Rebellious Son)
The verse describes the rare and severe case of a ben sorer u'moreh—a son who is stubborn, rebellious, and refuses to heed the discipline of his parents. The Torah outlines a strict legal process for such a case, which the Talmud (Sanhedrin 71a) states never actually occurred and was written solely for us to derive moral lessons.
Conditions for the Ben Sorer U'Moreh
According to the Mishnah (Sanhedrin 8:1-5) and Rashi (Devarim 21:18), the following conditions must be met for a child to be considered a ben sorer u'moreh:
Spiritual and Ethical Lessons
The Sages (Sanhedrin 71a) teach that this law was given to prompt introspection. The Ibn Ezra (Devarim 21:18) explains that the Torah uses extreme examples to warn parents about the dangers of neglecting a child's moral education. The Midrash (Tanchuma, Ki Teitzei 1) emphasizes that proper chinuch (education) from early childhood prevents such extreme rebellion.
The Severity of the Punishment
The Torah prescribes capital punishment for the ben sorer u'moreh, which the Talmud (Sanhedrin 72a) explains is a preemptive measure—better that he die innocent than grow into a violent criminal. Rambam (Moreh Nevuchim 3:41) adds that the law underscores the gravity of rejecting parental authority, which is the foundation of Torah observance.